Stories For My Mother .3
This stories for my mother will be jumping here and there. I will be story-ing things that come to my mind, not in any particular sequence. After I have put down most of the story worth telling, then, may be I will sort it out according as the event progresses. Anyway, to the story.I remember at one stage, my mother was very sick. She was down with stroke, as my earlier posts mentioned. She will go from able to walk with the aid of walking stick to not able to move her body at all in the bed. Most of us kids took turn to take care of her. I would loves to take care of her except for the fact that I was single at that time and that no one was at home most of the time.
Once, she was at one of my brother's place and she was quite weak. She had been there for quite sometime and it was quite straining to them. I can understand that. I offered to take care of my mother and went all the way south to fetch her. She was really weak and my heart ached for her. Somehow, I managed to get her into my car and brought her all the way to Klang and weak as she was, she was one determined old lady and managed to climb the two flight of stairs to go up to my flat. It took both of us around 20 minutes, I think, for a flight of stairs that shouldn't take more than 2 minutes, top. To tell you all the truth, it was not easy to hold on to a sick person, not when you are not properly trained.
Anyway, as the memories go, the very next day, I came home during lunch time and brought her some food for lunch. After having her lunch, she was back to lying down on her bed and mentioned that she needed to wash her hair, it has been quite sometime as her hand was weak, she was not able to raise it to wash her hand.
I told her to wait for me and I will wash for her after work. That day, I came home right after work and for the first time in my life, I bathe my mom. Tears were in my eye because, here is the woman who had shielded me, protected me and so helpless, that as a son, my heart really broke. Initially, I was shy. I was after all, a son. But as my mom had more or less given up on herself, I tried to be strong and tough and proceeded to give her a good hair wash and bath. Afterwards, it became a routine for me to bathe her everyday and I will tell you that, I thank God that I have the opportunity to take care of this woman called my mother. I believe that the love, the care I tried to give her during those moments, it helped. She got better and after two weeks or so, she don't need my assistant anymore to bathe herself. Her sheer determination amazes one. Not cured of course, but she don't have to lie on her bed for long period and was more cheerful and happy, though a little bit lonely because she is all alone by herself for a good portion of the day.
Still, we have bonded and for those time, I felt that I was one of the luckiest person on earth to have been born to this woman. Any other woman would have given up hope of life at that juncture but she persevered on and continue to live, albeit day to day. She told me that, she would move on a happy woman after the day that my sister and I have the family of our own. She did move on after a few years, when both my sister and I got married and have our own little family. As for my mother, she went from well (as well as a stroke patient can be) to serious. Thinking back, I believed the later doctor dignose was correct, she was much better when staying with me and deteriorates when she went to stay with my other brothers, probably due to the air and other allergens that could have burdened her already maxed out organs.
At times, I would think back how she must have felt, shy and embarrassed but helpless. I once told her, I am your son, there is nothing to be ashamed of. I think those words made her feel better. She always felt being a burden to her children but that is life, isn't it? At times, we might feel helpless but we don't get to choose our mothers, do we? For those who have the same experience as me, now that their mother is not with them anymore, would anybody mind the burden, if only their mother can be with them for a few more years?
posted by d'Frog Prince @ 9:45 AM
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